Regrets Collect
by PeachGlitch
Summary: A lot of things have changed since returning to Earth but some things will always remain the same.


"Did you want to come in?" A voice asked, causing Kathryn who had been hovering in front of the door to startle. The question was soft, with a hint of amusement in it. She turned to face the source of it and was surprised to see the familiar face of a colleague and more importantly, friend she'd grown to miss looking back at her.

All of a sudden she feels vulnerable under his gaze, exposed almost. It had been nearly a year since they'd seen each other face to face. A year since they'd returned to Earth only to go their separate ways. Not that they'd ever been as one in the first place, especially during those final few years aboard Voyager. Everything between them had rotted away into a facade of what they used to be. The lingering looks and soft touches replaced with dissapointment and sad glances.

"I didn't want to intrude," she says finally finding her voice. Her reply seemed to confuse him as Kathryn watches the lines on his face etch into a frown. Deeper and more pronounced than the last time she saw him.

"You would never.." Chakotay started to reply but stopped whatever he was going to say. She desperately wants him to finish, but instead he shakes his head and motions towards the door behind her, "I was just returning from a walk," he explains, "please come in with me."

The invitation catches her off guard. It's foolish because she was the one who had turned up here uninvited in the first place. Now standing between Chakotay and the entrance of his new home she felt self conscious. This was his life now and it did not include her, she needed to accept it and move on, and yet here she was. Unsure of herself and nervous, two traits she would never of been asociated with before .

"Are you sure?" She asks unable to stop herself, " I know I should of let you know I was coming."

Chakotay chuckled softly, his dimples prominent as ever, "You're always welcome here."

She tries not to give away anything with her expression, but inside she was sure her heart was about to burst. She pushes a strand of auburn hair behind her ear, its grown and now falls just below her shoulders.

"As long as Seven feels the same way, then I'd be happy to accompany you inside." She replies, careful to keep a neutral tone.

Her former protege was a sore subject. One she had never dared to air with him before. Back during their final months aboard Voyager she'd discovered their relationship and it had hurt her much more than she could ever explain. Whenever he would give their evening meals a 'rain check' it cut deep. Also on the flip side she had considered Seven to be like a daughter once, someone she had brought to life and mentored through her tremulous time adapting into a human again.

That betrayal stung much worse.

Chakotay's brows knit together, " Seven isn't here." He stated simply without further elaboration.

She looks at him suspiciously but didn't dare venture more into the subject, she simply nodded and smiled.

"It's getting cold out here, let's go inside," he continues and takes a step forward. His right hand comes to rest under the crook of her elbow and he ushers her into his home.

"I thought you said Seven wasn't here," she says as they cross the threshold.

"She isn't," he replies tersely and sends her a look of puzzlemenT.

"Sorry," she bows her head as he naturally slips her winter coat off of her shoulders, "it's just that you'd door wasn't locked so I assumed someone else was here as well."

pChakotay smiled warmly as he hangs the coat up behind the front door, then takes his own off to put next to hers. She can't help but marvel at how right they look there, hanging together , she also notes the lack of any other coats there as well,specifically another females.

"This is the only house here for miles, I'm sure you noticed," he explains and she nods numbly. "Besides this isn't a city, there's nothing much here to be afraid of, it's why I moved here after handing in my notice, it's peaceful."

She glanced around the interior of his home for the first time, and couldn't help but be in awe at the simplicity of it all. The house itself was more like a wooden cabin but much bigger, all the decor reminded her of his ready room back on Voyager. He had many things from his culture ha going up on the walls, it was all very much him. Which made her wonder what Seven thought of all this, she couldn't imagine the blonde wanting to settle down, not when she had a whole new world and countless universes to explore.

"It's lovely, Chakotay, really it is," she replies honestly, before settling her eyes on him again. "Although I have to say I was shocked when I heard you'd left Star Fleet for good."

He shifts his weight from one foot to another but continues to smile at her, "I never really was invested in it." He says casually, before motioning for her to follow him.

But Kathryn finds herself rooted on the spot, to shocked at his response to move, " I don't believe that for a second, you were a very dedicated first officer, one of the finest I've known." She says and it's true, no one was mor deserving of the title than he was.

He scratched his head nervously and nodded, " I was dedicated to you, Kathryn, not the federation," he admits and she can feel the heat rise on her cheeks.

"Chakotay I...

"It's okay, Kathryn, I know we have a lot to discuss," he steps forward into her personal space, "but we won't do this standing in my foyer, come lets sit and have a drink," he motions again for her to follow him into another room, "I even have some coffee stashed away somewhere".

"But you don't drink it," she says pointedly as he leads the way, she can feel his hand guiding her on the small of her back and it makes her feel nostalgic.

"No I don't," he agrees as they enter the quaint living room, "but I got some one day because I hoped that you would come, when you were ready." He admits almost bashfully before motnioning for her to take a seat on the couch.

"Now, let me get that coffee," he smiles and looks at her in a way that Kathryn can't help but smile back.


End file.
